The Job Hunter

Working at these stalls would be rather nice. But they don't accept job applications.

So it came to it today. I’d procrastinated enough, and I had to print off a batch of CVs and head out into the big wide town of Norwich to see if I could find a job. I took my trusty housemate with me, loaded up my bag with our precious information and set off. What follows is a tale of such dissapointment, such elation, so many highs and such crushing lows that you may just have to have a little breather halfway through.

First places we headed to were the big names, what I like to call the ‘daydream jobs’. In that they’re obviously not ideal, but they would be rather nice to work at, even if it was just for the employee discount. Included in this list are Waterstones, HMV, Zavvi, Game and Gamestation, and a few clothes shops which I honestly can’t tell apart. All of these wouldn’t be particularly bad places to work, and so we went there first, only to be deflected at nearly every shop with ‘go to our website, we list jobs there’. Umm… hang on… we’re going to your shop, CV in hand, saving you countless hours of admin, and you want us to go to your damn website? Of course this is also compounded by those that don’t have websites asking you to fill out a form. What the hell use is my CV then?

Luckily I kept all these feverent emotions bottled up while my housemate did the talking, me looking mildly disinterested and half disgusted a few feet away from him. It was necessary to show these damn fat cats my distaste at their slow corruption of today’s youth, what with their churned out styles and bland music. Oh yeah, I rage against the machine.

There were a few shops where I refused to hand in my CV, quoting some outlandish reason like they don’t stock the right sort of thing, or they only sell women’s clothes, and to work there would be an affront to my masculinity. Of course these are perfectly valid reasons, so I feel no shame at the lost job oppurtunity. Maybe when I hear nothing from all those I handed out today I might stoop so low, but it’d be a dark day indeed.

Heading back home, my bag a little lighter, I found myself thinking about just how ludicrous the whole job market is, at least for students. We were avoiding bar work and catering purely because we didn’t fancy losing our souls at a 3am shift, but all of these shop assistants seemed utterly dissinterested and frankly a little aloof to our inquiries, making it seem as though the shop is doing us the favour of giving us a job, rather than us helping the shop garner sales. I suppose that’s how it is in retail at the low level; we’re merely cheap robots, not asked to do anything beyond using a till and stacking shelves. There’s no room for originality or innovation. It’s a little sad, but I guess that’s life.

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About Phill Cameron

I've graduated, had a look at the world, and spat. Now I'm devoting my time to moving from 3/4 of a games journalist to 9/10ths. I figure I can get away with 9/10ths.
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