Ta Ra

Like this, but I go further.

I’m off for a good 30 hours. I’m going to London to see Mogwai tonight, and then go see a Pinter play tomorrow, starring the excellent Michael Gambon and David Walliams. Yes, I know you’re seething with jealousy, but we can’t really help that can we? So we do what we must, and we get things done.

This is going to serve more as an update than anything. Far Cry 2. It’s amazing. It’s incredible. It’s loads and loads of fun. It’s the closest a game has come to being as exhillerating as a film to me. I’ll probably throw up a review when I get finished with the story, but due to the fact that I’ve played for 8 hours and I’m only 20% of the way through, that might be a while. So, instead, I’m going to give you a quick account of my favourite moment so far.

Some African fellows commisioned me (being Josip, this cool old Albanian Dude) to go assassinate some guy in a shanty town. They were offering diamonds, and diamonds meant I could get cooler guns, so I didn’t really have any qualms. So I mosied on over in my Jeep, rusted assault rifle in hand.

As I neared the shanty town I stopped, got out, and crouched through the long grass as I came over to the shanty town. I always like to start out this way, being the stealthy type. It usually goes tits up, which means I get shot a lot, but I’m usually a lot closer by then so it gets more fun. Anyway, I spotted one guy guarding the road in to the town, so I aimed down the barrel and tried to pop a headshot. Only my gun jammed.

So I sat there, trying to fix this lodged bullet, when a bloody truck comes down the road, sees me, and starts firing it’s big fuck off machine gun at me. Realising that my cover had been quite thoroughly blown, I stood up and sprinted at the guy I’d tried to headshot. I slashed him with my machete, then whipped out my rifle and tried to work the jam free.

It wasn’t happening, and by this time the entire shanty town had come alive trying to kill me. So, like all good action heroes do, I ran. I ran into the shanty town. I say into, but I mean over. I dived off a ledge, landed on a roof and started roof jumping while still trying to work the jam free. Eventually I fell through a roof and landed in a room just as the I fixed my gun, which was handy as there were three guys in the room with me. A few bursts of hectic fire and they were dead, and I was still alive, gun working again.

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About Phill Cameron

I've graduated, had a look at the world, and spat. Now I'm devoting my time to moving from 3/4 of a games journalist to 9/10ths. I figure I can get away with 9/10ths.
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