Poor Show

And while we're at it, 'i'm' uses a capitalised 'I'. Cocks.

McDonald’s really sucks. I’d forgotten this, and today I was just smacked right back in the face with that refreshed and repackaged realisation. I’m not a big fan of fast food chains in general, but today was a stand up achievment in McDonald’s long and sucky history concerning serving me with mediocre and luke warm dross. Have a seat and let me break today’s events down for you.

So today I walked into town (10 minutes from my new house – score!) to pick up a copy of Spore, of which I’m going to do a Thoughts just as soon as I can tear myself away long enough to write it, and while I was there I thought I’d pick up some food to pass me by until supper. It being after 10:30am, I knew I wouldn’t be able to get breakfast at McDonald’s, pretty much the only reason to ever eat there, but I thought I’d chance lunch instead. This was, perhaps, my first mistake.

So I entered the eatery to see medium sized queues, daunting, but nothing I couldn’t handle, what with being English and all, so I mozied on over to the shortest one and waited it out. Doing a quick once over of the billboards above the servers, I saw a new burger advertised; The Big Tasty. I warn you now folks, it is neither big, nor tasty, and ordering it was a double mistake. The first was that it was ludicrously expensive (weighing in at £5.30, which, for my American reader’s, is about $11), and the second was that it tasted like crap. I’m not sure exactly what it was they put in it, but that advertisment was misleading as all hell.

However, this is still not the largest transgression of McDonald’s against my good humour. I’d be able to put up with a bad burger, soggy chips and a dent in my wallet if the outlet would live up to it’s one claim -Fast Food. I ordered at about 20 to 12, was told to sit down and wait for my meal to be brought to me (which should have immediately tipped me off that this was about to go down hill), and then once I found my table I proceeded to do the only thing available to me; listen to my music and wait.

Now before I continue let me explain something about English people, at least from where I herald. We will do anything to avoid a fuss. Absolutely anything. We’ll endure pretty much whatever anyone can throw at us if it means we can just pull up our collar and get on with our lives. So when I say it took me 15 minutes to call a member of staff over and inquire about my meal, you’ll realise that’s actually rather heroic for an English person.

Still, this isn’t the worst thing that McDonald’s did. Not only did it take 15 minutes for me to point out to them that I hadn’t had my meal yet, but the prat who I ordered my meal from had gone on a break. I mean really, poor show chaps. That’s really bad business. So I got my crap meal and I ate it with an angry expression on my face. I doubt I’ll be back in a hurry. Subway it is.

About Phill Cameron

I've graduated, had a look at the world, and spat. Now I'm devoting my time to moving from 3/4 of a games journalist to 9/10ths. I figure I can get away with 9/10ths.
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2 Responses to Poor Show

  1. dowanthappypants says:

    Mcdonalds food fails, srs bsns. Subway, and Sonics are the only acceptable American fast-food chains.

  2. chriswales says:

    Yeah….Maccy D’s suck balls. They are god awful, and your description sounds even worse than anything I have experienced with them.

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